I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
