Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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