There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
