Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
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