so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
We're too hungover to prance.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
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