That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Randomize
