The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
