in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
i believe in u and ur pee
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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