I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
