saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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