Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
