96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize