You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
