she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
