I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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