I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
