Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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