I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
