babies were throwing up all over the place
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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