Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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