it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
