i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I just want to make out with him forever
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Randomize
