wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
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