I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
