im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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