writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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