could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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