i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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