You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
You need a sexual gate keeper
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
