i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
