he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
My life is pants optional.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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