no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
