It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
