i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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