I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
