I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
