Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Dignity is for republicans.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
