Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize