We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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