i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
