windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
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