'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
