Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
