Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
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