as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
