idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Randomize