I want to stick my p in your. b.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
