My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize