It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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