i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
