So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
