Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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