I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
