my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
