I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
